[Summerland] punchy enough for cover blurb

Greg Saunders's picture

Hi All,

Working on some cover blurb for Summerland. How does this sound?

(Front cover)

Summerland

A role-playing game of Desolation and Redemption within the Sea of Leaves

(back cover)

The time is now. The world has changed.

The Event brought the Sea of Leaves into our world, drowning human civilisation in an immense forest, choking roads and cities overnight. From the woods came the Call, a lure to the weak that decimated the population. Now only pockets of humanity remain, fighting the Call. In the woods lurk the Lost, those who have succumbed to the Call, and the Wild, those who have forgotten that they were ever human.

Only a select few can resist the Call, and you are one of them. A Drifter, you are hardened to the lure of the woods due to psychological scarring from a past you can’t let go. Your pain shields you, but it is also responsible for your isolation. More than anything you crave to be welcomed into a community, but you can never be truly accepted until you resolve your past. And to do that, you must confront and defeat the demons that haunt you.

The question is how much are you willing to risk for redemption?

Some paper, pens, friends and a handful of six-sided dice are required for play.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Does that grab you? Is it punchy enough?

Cheers,

Greg

A few things

Shane Mclean's picture

Hi Greg,

I've not really followed the Summerland stuff, so I am coming into it with no real idea about it - hopefully that'll be a useful point of view.

Firstly, I'm drawn in by it. It sounds very cool indeed, and it's enough to make me want to pick it up to check it out.

There are a few minor comments, though, on the way it reads. Some of the sentences seem a little wordy and could be a little shorter (things like "but you can never be truly accepted" can lose the "you", "you crave to be welcomed into" could read "you crave welcome in" and things like that).

It grabs me, but it could be a little more immediate. Bear in mind, though, my experience of writing back cover blurb for publication is precisely nil.

Hope that's helpful in some way.

Regards,

Shane

Comments always welcome! Hi

Greg Saunders's picture

Comments always welcome!

Hi Shane, I'm glad you found it engaging, that, after all, is the hope!. I just got your email with your suggested tweaking and I like it! I'll use it if that's ok by you.

Thanks for the help,

Greg

You're welcome to...

Shane Mclean's picture

Hi Greg,

Glad the comments were useful. And sure, feel free to go ahead and use the stuff I e-mailed you.

Regards,

Shane